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Delonte West

Delonte West

Do 3-wheeled motorcycle (“Trike”) owners carry more weapons than the 2-wheeled brethren?

Although there is no scientific research or poll which confirms the “packing” attributes of each vehicle type, the recent arrest of NBA player Delonte West is an indicator that we might want to give the 3-wheeled riders a bit little more distance in the future!

Turns out that Mr. West, a D.C. native-turned NBA player for the Cav’s was riding his Can Am Spyder and was pulled over in Prince Georges County, MD at 10pm for — now get this — cutting off a law enforcement canine unit.  After being pulled over for “making an unsafe lane change” he was arrested for weapons possession.  What was most impressive was the assortment and number of weapons he was carrying on the trike — THREE!  One for each wheel.  A Beretta 9mm in his waistband, a Ruger .357 magnum strapped to his leg and a shotgun in a guitar case slung over his back.  Police charged West with two criminal counts of carrying a handgun for the Ruger and the Beretta, and issued him a traffic citation for driving “in excess of reasonable and prudent speed.”

CanAm Spyder -- Shotgun "optional"

CanAm Spyder -- Shotgun "optional"

Either he’s been watching too much “Arnold” (Terminator) or Son’s of Anarchy on FX.  Or maybe its time to put down the PS3 controller and give Grand Theft Auto a rest because this is retarded behavior.

My parents always taught me to follow the rules.  Don’t run with scissors.  Don’t litter. Don’t talk with your mouth full.  Don’t swim right after eating.  And don’t stick a loaded weapon down your pants (at least with the safety off — right Plaxico!).  Clearly I was brainwashed.  We have been fed this crap all our lives, that role models are the “gangsters” or rouge professional athletes.  The rich and famous are the ones addicted to the drugs.  Jail should be full of famous people, but they are so abnormal, and so admired, that we let them go on reduced charges.

Tomorrow, instead of going to Walmart to get a life, I’m going to steal some gasoline from the neighbors and go on a motorcycle road trip.  I’ll wear a samurai sword, get a DUI, smack a girl half my size, jump up on the brew pub stage and give Beyonce a video shout-out.  I’ll be abnormal tomorrow… just like Delonte… I want to get noticed for impersonating an athlete.

Photo courtesy of Elsa/Getty Images.

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LeBron James

LeBron James

These days it’s hard to turn on the TV and not hear an ESPN talking head evangelize the many virtues of “King James.”

After the Blazers fell to the Houston Rockets in the first round I’ve been forced to surf basketball channels and find another team to rally behind other than the “bad boyz” of Los Angeles.  Let me start off by saying that I actually like the 6-foot-9 NBA star LeBron James.  I like the way he plays and he is good.  Very good.  So good in fact that he was named NBA Rookie of the year in 2003-04, NBA MVP in 2008-09 and has been both All-NBA and the All-Star every season since 2005.  On the US men’s national basketball team he has won a bronze medal at the 2004 Olympics and a gold at the 2008 Olympics

At just 18, LeBron was selected with the number one pick in the 2003 NBA draft by the Cavaliers and signed a $90M shoe contract with Nike before his professional debut.  Does Nike know how to pick ‘em or what?!  The Cavs have so dominated the competition this year that every game has been won in double digits, a record, and none of their playoff games have come with any drama.  There are all the no-look passes, the step-back 3-pointers from 10’ behind the arc and the reverse dunks.  Is there anyone else on the team roster that you can remember his name?  It’s as if the arm-swinging cloud of talcum powder halo follows him everywhere. It’s important to note that King James Inc. (LeBron’s wholly owned company) organizes many charity events including the annual King for Kids Bike-a-thon in Akron, Ohio.

Salary_CompareBut in these recessionary times, employee cuts and school district sacrifices along with budget shortfalls the message of collective sacrifice seems to have missed the NBA and pro athletes.  LeBron will be paid $14.4M this season by the Cavs and his annual earnings off the court were estimated by Forbes magazine at $14M.  The enormous magnitude of salary differential really hit home when I compared salaries using the Cleveland Ohio Statistics calculator.  For example, I plugged in an aspirational blogger salary of $100K. Based on 45 years of work per lifetime it would take  6.31 lifetimes to equal LeBron’s pay for just one season!  ONE SEASON!!  Let me bring it even closer for you.  Based on a 40 hour work week, LeBron’s hourly pay is $13,658.93 vs. $48.08 on a very respectable $100K annual salary.  He made over $6800 in the time it took to write this post.  Looking to raise your blood pressure?  Play with the calculator HERE

Call me crazy, but I suspect LeBron isn’t much concerned about today’s US Postal Service increase of a first-class stamp going to $0.44 cents.

Photo courtesy Nike and Cleveland.com.

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